Single motherhood






Hi, I'm a Kenyan-born, Colorado-based single mom to twins Hodari and Milambu. I turned the challenges of single motherhood into a thriving YouTube community and blog. Here, I offer support and practical advice on parenting, lifestyle, and more. Let's navigate life's complexities together!


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single motherhood





As a single mom, you may feel like you’re constantly facing an uphill battle. Work, finances, and the daily responsibilities of raising children can be overwhelming at times. However, while being a single mom is undoubtedly challenging, it can also change you for the better in many ways.

As a fellow single mom, I have seen firsthand how being a single mom can transform a woman’s life. It requires immense strength, resilience, and resourcefulness, all of which can help you grow and become a better version of yourself. Whether you’re a newly single mom or have been raising your children alone for years, it’s essential to recognize the ways in which single motherhood can positively impact your life.

Now I am not saying you should become a single mom so you can experience these “benefits”. No one wishes they were raising kids alone or juggling responsibilities alone. In this post, I want to share how being a single mom has made me better, even though it isn’t the way I wanted my life to go.

Ways Being A Single Mom Has Changed Me for The Better

Ways Being A Single Mom Has Changed Me for The Better: Practical Insights for Embracing the Challenges and Thriving

1. It Has Made Me Stronger

Being a single mom requires immense strength and resilience. You have to be strong not only for yourself but also for your children. I have learned that I can handle more than I ever thought possible. Single motherhood has taught me to be strong, determined, and resourceful in the face of adversity.

2. I Have Had To Rely On God More

Prior to becoming a single mom, I did not have a strong relationship with God. However, the difficulties and challenges that I have faced on this journey have led me to lean on Him more. Not only that, I realize that as the head of my household, it’s my responsibility to lead my family spiritually. I am the one who has to protect my family, lead them, and provide for them. I can’t do it on my own. I have had to rely on the only One who is strong enough to carry the burdens that are on my shoulders.

I have also gone through the most painful time in my life dealing with co-parenting battles. In these times, I have had to cry out to God to heal my heart and fix my brokenness. If I hadn’t gone through these challenges, I probably wouldn’t have relied on God as much as I did. That’s why I am thankful for this season–it has brought me closer to the source of my strength.

3. It Has Taught Me To Prioritize

As a single mom, you have to juggle work, finances, and children’s needs, all on your own. This means that you learn to prioritize what is essential and focus your energy and resources on what truly matters. You learn to make tough decisions and choose what’s best for your family, even if it’s not always what’s easiest for you.

4. I Have Learned The Importance of Self-care

Single motherhood can be stressful and overwhelming, but it’s essential to take care of yourself too. You learn the importance of self-care and make time for yourself amidst your busy schedule. Whether it’s taking a relaxing bath or reading a book, you understand that taking care of your mental and physical health is essential for your well-being and your children’s.

Related: 30-Day Self-Care Challenge for Single Moms

5. It Has Taught Me to Be Independent

When you’re a single mom, you don’t have a partner to rely on for help, so you become more independent. This doesn’t mean that I’ll never need a man but in the meantime, I have learned to handle household repairs, finances, and all the other responsibilities that come with raising children. Being independent has helped me gain confidence in myself and my abilities.

6. It Has Shown Me The Beauty of Motherhood

Being a mother is a beautiful and rewarding experience, and single motherhood has only intensified that feeling for me. Raising children alone can be tough, but it’s also incredibly rewarding. As a single mom, you get to experience all the joys and milestones of motherhood on a deeper level, and you appreciate the little moments with your children more especially when you have to co-parent and find yourself without your children for periods of time.

7. It Has Instilled A Strong Work Ethic in Me

Knowing that the responsibilities of my household rest squarely on my shoulders forces me to work hard so I can provide for my family. I have learned to push myself harder than ever before and take on new challenges with determination and resilience. This has instilled a sense of pride and accomplishment in me that I can pass on to my children.

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8. I Have Grown More Emotionally Strong And Self-assured

Dealing with depression and disappointment during my journey as a single mom was an incredibly challenging experience. At times, it left me feeling hopeless and overwhelmed, constantly worried and fearful of what the future held. However, through these struggles, I have learned to become stronger emotionally.

One of the key lessons I have learned is the importance of forgiveness. Holding onto grudges or resentments can be a heavy burden, weighing down not only on our emotional well-being but also on our ability to move forward. As a single mom, I have experienced a wide range of emotions, from frustration and anger to sadness and disappointment. But learning to forgive others has helped me to let go of those negative emotions and move forward.

Another important aspect of emotional strength that I have developed is the ability to cope with stress and anxiety. Single motherhood comes with a lot of responsibilities and pressures, which can lead to feelings of overwhelm and anxiety. Through prayer and self-reflection, I have learned various coping mechanisms such as reading my bible, exercise, and mindfulness techniques that help me manage stress and anxiety effectively.

In addition, I have learned the importance of surrounding myself with positive and supportive people. Having a strong support system, whether it be friends, family, or even a therapist, has been instrumental in helping me navigate the challenges of single motherhood. They provide encouragement and help me to see the positive in difficult situations, which helps to build my emotional strength and resilience.

9. I Have Learned To Ask for Help

It can be easy to fall into the trap of feeling like you need to do everything on your own. The pressure of being the sole provider for your family can be overwhelming, and it can be tempting to try to handle everything on your own. However, I have learned that it’s okay to ask for help.

Asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness and it doesn’t mean that I am incapable or incompetent. It simply means that I am human, and I recognize my limits. It takes courage to admit that you can’t do everything on your own and that you need help. Whether it’s asking a friend to watch the kids for a few hours so I can run errands or reaching out to family for support during a difficult time, I have learned to lean on those around me when I need it.

10. It Has Helped Me Appreciate The Little Things

Single motherhood has made me appreciate the little moments with my children more than ever before. From snuggling up on the couch to reading bedtime stories, I have learned to cherish these small moments and recognize their significance in creating a strong bond with my children. This is even more apparent when they leave to be with their dad. Cherishing the little moments helps me cope when they’re away knowing that I did my best when they were with me.

11. I Have Become More Empathetic

Being a single mom has made me more empathetic toward others who may be facing similar struggles. I understand the challenges of balancing work, finances, and family responsibilities, and I have a greater appreciation for the difficulties that others may be facing in their own lives.

12. I Am More Flexible

As a single mom, plans can change at a moment’s notice, and I have learned to be more flexible and adaptable. Whether it’s rearranging my work schedule to accommodate a sick child or changing my plans to fit in a last-minute activity with my children, I have become more comfortable with adjusting to unexpected situations.


Being a single mom has been a challenging and rewarding journey that has changed me in countless ways. Through the ups and downs, I have learned to become more emotionally strong, independent, and self-reliant. I have learned to lean on God, prioritize my children’s needs, be resourceful in finding solutions to problems, and never give up, even when faced with the toughest of challenges.

Above all, being a single mom has taught me the importance of perseverance and resilience. The road has not always been easy, and there have been times when I felt like giving up. However, through perseverance and the support of my loved ones, I have learned to overcome obstacles and to keep moving forward. I am proud of the person I have become through this journey, and I am grateful for the lessons and experiences that have shaped me into the strong and determined woman I am today.

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12 Ways Being A Single Mom Has Changed Me for The Better

Mar 25, 2023

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  1. Tina Butler

    March 26th, 2023 at 5:13 PM

    Love this so much! I’m a single mother too and I agree with everything you’ve written.

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