Single motherhood






Hi, I'm a Kenyan-born, Colorado-based single mom to twins Hodari and Milambu. I turned the challenges of single motherhood into a thriving YouTube community and blog. Here, I offer support and practical advice on parenting, lifestyle, and more. Let's navigate life's complexities together!


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single motherhood





As a Christian single mom, life can sometimes feel like an uphill battle. The weight of responsibilities can be overwhelming, and it’s all too easy to doubt yourself or question if you’re doing enough. In the midst of these challenges, the Bible stands as a beacon of hope, offering us timeless wisdom and guidance for every aspect of our lives. And when it comes to finding inspiration and encouragement, few passages hold as much power as the description of the Proverbs 31 woman.

Her story, painted with words of strength and virtue, serves as a roadmap for navigating the complexities of single motherhood. In her, we see a woman who defies limitations, embraces her role with grace, and leaves an indelible mark on her family and community. She is a testament to the extraordinary strength and resilience that can be found within the hearts of single moms.

As we journey through the pages of Proverbs 31, we uncover invaluable lessons that resonate deeply with our own experiences. Lessons that empower us to rise above our circumstances, discover our worth, and nurture a legacy of faith and love. From her unwavering trust in God to her unwavering commitment to her family, the Proverbs 31 woman offers a blueprint for navigating the complexities of single motherhood with grace and purpose.

In this blog post, we will delve into the depths of Proverbs 31 and extract 10 transformative lessons that single moms can learn from this remarkable woman. Each lesson, supported by scripture and accompanied by an action plan, will illuminate the path toward embracing your identity as a strong and virtuous woman of God.

7 Eye-Opening Lessons for Single Moms from Proverbs 31

1. Prioritize Your Relationship with God

“Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing,
But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.”

– Proverbs 31:30

In today’s culture, there is often a great emphasis on external beauty and charm. However, the Proverbs 31 woman teaches us a valuable lesson about what truly matters. The Scripture in Proverbs 31:30 reminds us that while charm may deceive and beauty may fade, a woman who fears the Lord will be praised. Her fear of the Lord refers to her deep reverence, respect, and awe for God and His ways.

This attribute of fearing the Lord was the foundation of the Proverbs 31 woman’s life. It shaped her character, influenced her decisions, and guided her actions. She understood that true beauty and value come from aligning her life with God’s principles and seeking His approval above all else. It was her relationship with God that set her apart and brought honor and praise to her life.

As a single mom, it is essential to prioritize your relationship with God. By doing so, you lay a strong foundation for yourself and your children. Here is an action plan to help you make spending time with God a priority in your daily life:

  • Set aside dedicated moments: Create intentional time in your schedule specifically for connecting with God. Whether it’s in the morning, during a lunch break, or in the evening, find a time that works best for you. Make it a non-negotiable appointment with God.
  • Engage in prayer: Prayer is a powerful tool that allows you to communicate with God. Set aside time to pour out your heart to Him, expressing your joys, concerns, and needs. Develop a habit of both talking to God and listening for His voice.
  • Read and meditate on the Bible: The Word of God is a source of wisdom, guidance, and encouragement. Dedicate time to read and reflect on Scripture. Choose a reading plan or study guide that suits your needs and interests. Take notes, highlight meaningful verses, and allow the truth of God’s Word to shape your thinking and actions.
  • Seek God’s guidance in all areas of life: Involve God in every aspect of your life. Bring your decisions, concerns, and dreams before Him. Seek His guidance and wisdom through prayer and meditation on His Word. Trust that He knows what is best for you and your family.
  • Trust in God’s provision: As a single mom, you may face various challenges and responsibilities. Trust in God’s faithfulness to provide for your needs. Rely on Him for strength, guidance, and provision. Surrender your worries and anxieties to Him, knowing that He cares for you and your children.

By prioritizing your relationship with God, you invite His presence and power into your life as a single mom. He will give you the wisdom, strength, and grace you need to navigate the challenges and joys of motherhood. Remember, your worth and value are not determined by society’s standards but by your fear of the Lord and your obedience to His ways. Allow your relationship with God to be the foundation upon which you build your life as a single mom, and you will experience His abundant blessings and praise.

2. Work Diligently and with Excellence

“She watches over the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.”

– Proverbs 31:27

In our modern world, where distractions abound and instant gratification is often sought after, the Proverbs 31 woman’s example of diligence and hard work stands out as an inspiring model for single moms. Proverbs 31:27 states, “She watches over the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.” This verse paints a picture of a woman who takes her responsibilities seriously, managing her household with wisdom and care.

To embrace a strong work ethic in all areas of your life, it is important to understand the various roles and responsibilities that come with being a single mom. Here are some practical action steps to help you cultivate diligence and excellence:

  • Embrace a Strong Work Ethic: As a single mom, you juggle numerous responsibilities, including your career, taking care of your children, and managing your home. Embrace a strong work ethic in all areas of your life. Understand that the work you do is valuable and significant. Approach your tasks with a sense of purpose and commitment, knowing that your efforts contribute to the well-being of your family.
  • Be Diligent in Your Work: Whether you’re pursuing a career outside the home or primarily focused on raising your children, be diligent in your work. Give your best effort and attention to the tasks at hand. Prioritize your time, set achievable goals, and create a schedule that allows you to effectively manage your responsibilities. Avoid procrastination and strive to complete your tasks in a timely manner.
  • Seek Excellence: The Proverbs 31 woman’s diligence was not merely about getting things done; she pursued excellence in all she undertook. Likewise, aim to do everything with excellence. Take pride in your work, whether it’s cooking nutritious meals, keeping your home tidy, excelling in your career, or raising your children. Give attention to detail, learn new skills, and continuously seek ways to improve and grow.
  • Find Joy in Your Work: Cultivate a positive mindset and find joy in your work, even during challenging times. Recognize that the work you do as a single mom has purpose and significance. Celebrate small victories and milestones along the way. Shift your perspective to see your tasks as opportunities to express love and nurture your family. When you find joy in your work, it not only benefits you but also creates a positive atmosphere for your children.

By following the example of the Proverbs 31 woman, single moms can cultivate a strong work ethic and approach their tasks with diligence and excellence. Embrace the responsibilities that come with managing your household, career, and caring for your children. Remember to find joy in your work, practice effective time management, seek support when needed, take care of yourself, and celebrate progress along the way. With these principles in mind, you can navigate the challenges of single motherhood with grace, strength, and purpose.

RELATED: 10 Powerful Truths I’ve Learned About God’s Character While Coparenting

3. Practice Financial Wisdom

“She considers a field and buys it; from her profits she plants a vineyard.”

– Proverbs 31:16

The Proverbs 31 woman serves as a model of financial wisdom and stewardship. She was not only diligent in her work but also strategic in her financial decisions. The verse in Proverbs 31:16 highlights her thoughtful approach to investment.

The key aspect of this verse lies in the woman’s ability to assess the potential of a field and make a well-informed purchase. She recognizes the value of investing in a productive asset that can generate income for her family. Moreover, she uses the profits from her initial investment to further expand her resources by planting a vineyard. This demonstrates her understanding of the importance of reinvesting and diversifying her income streams.

As single moms, practicing financial wisdom is essential for providing for ourselves and our children. Here are some practical steps you can take to be a wise steward of your resources:

  • Create a budget: Start by evaluating your income and expenses. Track your spending habits and prioritize essential needs while minimizing unnecessary expenses. Set aside funds for bills, groceries, education, healthcare, and savings.
  • Save for emergencies: Build an emergency fund to handle unexpected expenses or financial setbacks. Aim to save at least three to six months’ worth of living expenses. Set aside a portion of your income each month specifically for this purpose.
  • Seek financial advice: If you feel overwhelmed or unsure about managing your finances, consider seeking professional advice. Consult with a financial advisor who can help you create a personalized financial plan, provide guidance on investments, and offer strategies for achieving your long-term financial goals.
  • Manage debt wisely: Prioritize paying off high-interest debts and avoid unnecessary borrowing. Develop a plan to reduce your debt gradually, and consider seeking professional assistance if needed.
  • Regularly review and adjust: Periodically review your financial situation and reassess your goals. Make necessary adjustments to your budget, investments, and savings plan as circumstances change.

Remember, practicing financial wisdom is not about accumulating wealth for selfish gain but rather ensuring stability and provision for yourself and your family. By being intentional with your financial decisions and seeking God’s guidance, you can honor Him with your resources and be better equipped to navigate the challenges and opportunities that come your way. Trust in His provision and be diligent in managing what He has entrusted to you.

RELATED: How To Financially Prepare For Baby As A Pregnant Single Mom: 10 Tips for Success

4. Nurture Strong Family Relationships

“Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her.”

– Proverbs 31:28

The Proverbs 31 woman’s strong and loving family is a testament to the intentional effort she put into nurturing her relationships. She understood the significance of investing time, love, and care into building healthy bonds with her children and husband. Her dedication to creating a harmonious and loving home environment serves as an inspiration for single moms today.

Here are a few ways you can nurture strong family relationships:

  • Prioritize Quality Time: Make a conscious effort to spend quality time with your children. Set aside dedicated moments each day or week to engage in activities that create lasting memories. It can be as simple as reading a book together, going for a walk, cooking a meal, or engaging in a shared hobby. These moments of undivided attention will strengthen the bonds between you and your children.
  • Foster Open Communication: Create an atmosphere of open communication within your family. Encourage your children to share their thoughts, feelings, and concerns with you. Be an attentive listener, providing them with a safe space to express themselves without judgment. By fostering open communication, you can develop a deeper understanding of your children’s needs and aspirations.
  • Practice Active Listening: Actively listening to your children involves more than just hearing their words. Pay attention to their body language, emotions, and underlying messages. Show genuine interest in their lives, ask thoughtful questions, and seek to understand their perspective. This practice will help build trust and strengthen your connection with them.
  • Engage in Intentional Engagement: Be intentional in your interactions with your children. Engage in activities that promote their emotional, intellectual, and spiritual growth. Take an interest in their hobbies and passions, and participate alongside them when possible. Plan outings, family game nights, or movie nights that encourage bonding and create a sense of togetherness.
  • Develop a Harmonious Co-Parenting Relationship (if applicable): If you share custody or have a co-parenting relationship with your children’s father, strive for mutual respect and cooperation. Communicate openly and respectfully about parenting decisions and support each other’s involvement in your children’s lives. Aim to provide a unified and loving environment for your children, even if the romantic relationship has ended.
  • Lead by Example: As a single mom, your actions speak volumes to your children. Model the values and virtues you want to instill in them. Demonstrate love, forgiveness, humility, and integrity in your words and actions. Show them the importance of faith, compassion, and resilience. Your children will learn from observing your behavior, and by leading by example, you can inspire them to grow into kind, responsible, and compassionate individuals.

Nurturing strong family relationships as a single mom requires intentional effort, love, and commitment. By prioritizing quality time, fostering open communication, practicing active listening, engaging in intentional activities, developing a harmonious co-parenting relationship (if applicable), leading by example, and seeking support, you can build a loving and secure environment for your children. Remember that building strong family relationships is a journey, and it takes time and patience. Stay steadfast, rely on God’s wisdom, and trust that your efforts will bear fruit in the lives of your children.

5. Embrace Inner Strength and Dignity

“Strength and honor are her clothing; she shall rejoice in time to come.”

– Proverbs 31:25

The Proverbs 31 woman exuded inner strength and dignity. She faced the challenges that came her way with courage and maintained a positive outlook on the future. Despite the demands of her responsibilities, she remained steadfast and resolute, knowing that her strength and worth came from the Lord.

Cultivating a resilient spirit and a positive mindset is essential for single moms who face various challenges. By following this action plan, you can embrace your inner strength and dignity:

  • Lean on God’s strength: Recognize that you are not alone in your journey. God promises to be with you and provide the strength you need. Rely on His power and grace to carry you through difficult times.
  • Regularly seek God’s presence through prayer, worship, and reading His Word. Allow His strength to infuse you, empowering you to face each day with confidence.
  • Find your worth and identity in God: In a world that often measures worth based on external factors, it’s crucial to root your identity in God’s unchanging love and acceptance. Your value is not determined by your relationship status or the opinions of others.
  • Take care of yourself holistically: As a single mom, it’s easy to neglect self-care amidst the busyness of life. However, nurturing your physical, emotional, and spiritual well-being is crucial for maintaining inner strength and dignity.
  1. Physical Care: Prioritize healthy habits such as proper nutrition, regular exercise, and sufficient rest. Take time for activities that bring you joy and rejuvenation.
  2. Emotional Care: Allow yourself to express and process your emotions in healthy ways. Seek support from trusted friends, family members, or a counselor. Engage in activities that promote emotional well-being, such as journaling or engaging in hobbies you enjoy.
  3. Spiritual Care: Cultivate a vibrant relationship with God. Spend time in prayer, worship, and studying His Word. Seek opportunities for spiritual growth, such as attending church, joining a small group, or participating in a Bible study.
  • Seek God’s renewal and restoration: Life as a single mom can be exhausting, and at times you may feel depleted. However, God offers renewal and restoration for your weary soul. Turn to Him and allow Him to refresh and strengthen you.

Embracing your inner strength and dignity as a single mom is not an easy task, but with God’s help, it is possible. By leaning on His strength, finding your worth and identity in Him, taking care of yourself holistically, and seeking His renewal, you can cultivate a resilient spirit and maintain a positive outlook on the future. Remember, God sees your efforts and loves you unconditionally. Allow His presence to guide and empower you, knowing that you are worthy, strong, and deserving of dignity.

RELATED: The Best Self-Care Practices While Co-Parenting With A Toxic Ex

6. Seek and Value Wise Counsel

“She opens her mouth with wisdom, and on her tongue is the law of kindness.”

– Proverbs 31:26

The Proverbs 31 woman valued wisdom and sought counsel from trusted sources. She understood the importance of seeking guidance to make wise decisions. She was not afraid to acknowledge that she didn’t have all the answers. She recognized the value of seeking wisdom from others who had experience and knowledge in areas where she needed guidance. By surrounding herself with wise counsel, she gained insights and perspectives that helped her make informed decisions.

Surround yourself with wise and godly individuals who can provide guidance and support. Seek advice from mentors, pastors, and other single moms who have walked a similar path. Pray for discernment and clarity as you make important decisions, trusting in God’s wisdom.

  • Identify Wise and Godly Individuals: Look for individuals in your church, community, or social circles who display wisdom, godliness, and have a heart for helping others. Seek out mentors who can offer guidance, pastors who can provide spiritual counsel, and friends who have a strong faith and wisdom in navigating life’s challenges.
  • Build Relationships: Invest time and effort in building relationships with these wise and godly individuals. Attend church events, small groups, or community gatherings where you can connect with like-minded people. Foster authentic relationships based on trust and mutual respect.
  • Seek Advice and Support: When faced with important decisions or challenges, don’t hesitate to seek counsel from your mentors, pastors, and trusted friends. Share your concerns, seek their insights, and ask for their prayers. They can offer perspectives you may not have considered and provide valuable guidance based on their own experiences and wisdom.
  • Connect with Single Moms: Reach out to other single moms who have walked a similar path. Join support groups, attend workshops or conferences specifically designed for single moms, or engage in online communities. These fellow moms can offer understanding, empathy, and practical advice based on their own firsthand experiences.
  • Pray for Discernment: As you seek guidance from others, remember to seek God’s wisdom above all else. Spend time in prayer, asking for discernment and clarity in decision-making. Invite the Holy Spirit to guide your thoughts and actions, and trust that God will provide the wisdom you need. Pray for wisdom not only for yourself but also for those who offer counsel to you.
  • Exercise Discernment: While seeking counsel is important, exercise discernment in determining whose advice to follow. Not all counsel will be applicable or aligned with your values and beliefs. Compare the advice received against the truths found in God’s Word. Seek counsel that aligns with biblical principles and reflects God’s heart for you and your family.

Remember, seeking wise counsel is not a sign of weakness but a demonstration of humility and wisdom. By surrounding yourself with godly individuals and seeking their advice, you can gain valuable insights, avoid unnecessary pitfalls, and make well-informed decisions. Trust in God’s guidance as you navigate the challenges of single motherhood, and lean on the wisdom and support of those who walk alongside you.

7. Plan for the Future

“She is not afraid of snow for her household, for all her household is clothed with scarlet.”

– Proverbs 31:21

The Proverbs 31 woman was proactive in preparing for the future. She understood the importance of anticipating and meeting the needs of her family, even in challenging times. The mention of snow in this verse symbolizes difficult and unexpected circumstances that can arise. Despite these potential challenges, she remained confident and prepared, ensuring that her household was protected and well taken care of.

Taking steps to secure your family’s future is not only a wise decision but also a responsibility as a single mom. Here are some practical actions you can take to plan for the future:

  • Set Goals: Begin by setting clear and achievable goals for yourself and your family. Define short-term and long-term objectives related to education, career, finances, and personal growth. This will provide a roadmap to follow and give you a sense of direction.
  • Save for Education or Retirement: Education is a valuable investment in your children’s future. Start saving for their education as early as possible, exploring options like a college savings plan or a 529 savings account. Simultaneously, prioritize your retirement savings to ensure financial security in your later years. Seek advice from financial professionals to guide you in making informed decisions.
  • Obtain Adequate Insurance Coverage: Protecting your family from unforeseen circumstances is crucial. Evaluate your insurance coverage and make sure you have adequate policies in place. This may include health insurance, life insurance, disability insurance, and homeowner’s or renter’s insurance. Assess your specific needs and consult with an insurance agent to determine the best coverage for you and your family.
  • Seek Wise Counsel for Long-Term Financial Planning: Long-term financial planning can be complex, and seeking advice from financial experts can be immensely beneficial. Consider consulting with a financial planner or advisor who can help you create a comprehensive financial plan tailored to your specific circumstances. They can guide you in areas such as investments, retirement planning, debt management, and estate planning.
  • Ensure Children’s Future Readiness: As a single mom, it’s essential to equip your children for their future. Focus not only on their education but also on their character development and life skills. Encourage them to pursue their passions, develop strong values, and cultivate resilience. Teach them about financial responsibility, budgeting, and saving. By empowering your children with essential life skills, you are preparing them to navigate their own paths successfully.

Remember, planning for the future requires discipline, patience, and perseverance. It may involve sacrifices in the present, but the long-term benefits will be worth it. Trust that God will guide and provide as you faithfully steward the resources He has entrusted to you. By taking intentional steps to plan for the future, you are demonstrating wisdom, love, and care for your family, ensuring a more secure and fruitful journey ahead.

RELATED: The Best Biblical Solutions for Handling Injustice in Co-parenting

Wrapping Up…

In conclusion, the Proverbs 31 woman stands as a timeless inspiration for single moms everywhere. Her story reminds us that despite the challenges we face, we are capable of embodying strength, virtue, and unwavering faith. As Christian single moms, we can find solace and guidance in the pages of Proverbs 31, discovering invaluable lessons that resonate with our own experiences.

Through the Proverbs 31 woman, we have learned to prioritize our relationship with God, work diligently with excellence, practice financial wisdom, nurture strong family relationships, plan for the future, embrace inner strength and dignity, and seek wise counsel.

As we apply these principles to our lives, we unlock a renewed sense of purpose and direction. We realize that we are not alone in our journey, but rather part of a community of single moms who strive to raise their children with love, grace, and unwavering faith in God. Together, we can support and uplift one another, sharing the wisdom and insights we have gained from the Proverbs 31 woman.

7 Powerful Proverbs 31 Lessons Single Moms Need To Know

Jul 22, 2023

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