Being surrounded by the sound of my children’s laughter and still feeling alone is a familiar feeling for me, as a single mom. But it’s in the moments when they’re gone; when the house is quiet and empty, that loneliness becomes almost unbearable. It’s like a heavy weight that settles over me, suffocating and relentless.
On those nights, I often find myself scrolling through social media, seeing pictures of friends out with their partners or families, and feeling like I’m the only one in the world who’s alone. The silence in my house feels deafening, and I’m left with my own thoughts and fears. The fear that I’ll never find love again, that my kids will suffer because of my choices, that I’ll have to spend the rest of my life in this loneliness. It’s a suffocating feeling like I’m trapped in a bubble of loneliness that no one else can understand.
But over time, I’ve learned that I don’t have to stay stuck in that feeling of loneliness. There are ways to cope and find joy in my solo journey, even when it feels like I’m the only one on the path. I’ve learned to combat the lies of the devil with the truth of God’s word.
If you’re a single mom feeling the weight of loneliness, know that you’re not alone. It’s a common struggle, but it doesn’t have to define your journey. With support, faith, and intentional choices, you can find joy and meaning in your solo journey. Here are some tips to help you build a support system, combat the lies with biblical truth, and engage in activities that bring you fulfillment and purpose.
When you’re feeling lonely, it’s easy to turn to things that may temporarily numb the pain but never really solve the issue. Instead, turn to God and seek His presence in your solitude. Psalm 73:23-26 reminds us that God is always with us, even in our darkest moments: “Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand. You guide me with your counsel, and afterward, you will take me into glory. Whom have I in heaven but you? And earth has nothing I desire besides you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.”
While it’s important to seek God’s presence, it’s also important to connect with other believers who can encourage and support you. Hebrews 10:24-25 encourages us to “consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds…” Join a small group at your church or connect with other single moms in a Bible study or prayer group. You’ll be surprised at how much of a difference it can make to have others walking alongside you.
When the kids are gone, use that time to take care of yourself and reflect on your journey. Take a long bath, read a book, or write in a journal. Use this time to reflect on God’s goodness in your life and all the blessings you have. Philippians 4:8 reminds us to think about “whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” When we focus on the good, it can change our perspective and bring joy even in the midst of loneliness.
Don’t be afraid to reach out for help when you need it. Whether it’s asking a friend to watch your kids so you can have some time to yourself or reaching out to a counselor or pastor for support, there is no shame in needing help. God created us for community and to support one another. Galatians 6:2 reminds us to “carry each other’s burdens, and in this way, you will fulfill the law of Christ.”
As a single mom, it can be easy to feel alone and like nobody understands what you’re going through. However, it’s important to remember that God is always with you and is an ever-present friend. Psalm 46:1 says, “God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.” Even when we feel lonely or forgotten, God is with us and is a source of comfort and strength.
So when you start to believe the lie that you’re alone, remind yourself of this truth and take comfort in the fact that God is always with you. Spend time in prayer and reading the Bible to draw closer to Him and find peace in His presence.
When you’re feeling lonely, it’s easy to focus on what you don’t have and what’s missing in your life. Instead, try practicing gratitude and focusing on what you do have. Start a gratitude journal and write down three things you’re thankful for each day. 1 Thessalonians 5:18 reminds us to “give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” When we focus on the blessings we do have, it can shift our perspective and help us find joy even in the midst of difficult circumstances.
Serving others is a great way to combat loneliness and find purpose. Look for opportunities to volunteer in your church or community, or even just do something kind for a neighbor. Hebrews 13:16 reminds us to “not forget to do good and to share with others, for with such sacrifices God is pleased.” When we serve others, it not only helps them but also brings us joy and fulfillment.
Engaging in a creative activity can be a great way to relieve stress and combat loneliness. Whether it’s painting, writing, or knitting, find something you enjoy and make time for it. Psalm 33:3 encourages us to “sing to him a new song; play skillfully, and shout for joy.” When we engage in creative activities, it can bring us joy and also be a way to honor and worship God.
As a single mom who has experienced overwhelming feelings of loneliness, I know firsthand how challenging it can be to navigate through those moments. However, it is important to remember that we are not alone, and with God’s help, we can overcome those negative emotions and find joy and fulfillment in our solo journey. By implementing the tips shared here and continuing to seek support from friends, family, and the community, we can combat the lies of loneliness and live a fulfilling life.
It won’t be easy, but it is possible. Remember, you are loved, valued, and capable of achieving great things. Take things one step at a time, lean into your faith, and trust that God has a plan for your life. Your journey as a single mom may not be what you expected, but it is uniquely yours. Embrace it, find joy in it, and know that you are never truly alone.
Apr 5, 2023
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